Time for a Change.....It's Inevitable! How to Not Get Overwhelmed on Your Journey

Last time we talked about change having a nature and structure. Understanding this one thing will go a long way in helping us with our resolutions this year and any other challenges that you have.

First things first. Change is inevitable. Many of us refuse to accept this one important fact. Regardless to what you think, do, or decide, change will occur. It will occur within you, outside of you, in others, or outside others, because of you or despite you. Situations change, people change, economies change, politics change, our bodies change, relationships change, even the seasons change.

At its root not understanding and acquiescing to this one fact will derail any plan and execution to any changes. I remember when I was younger, I struggled with my weight…I still do sometimes. My weight fluctuations were mostly seasonal but had a lot to do with what I did, what I ate and how I felt. When I was much younger and I wanted to lose the weight, I was able to do so almost seemingly at will. I could lose those fifteen to twenty pounds whenever I wanted too. Not so much today. What happened? Let’s see, I’m older now so my metabolic system is not as active as it once was. I do not exercise as often and as hard as I used to. I have other responsibilities that distract from ideal self-care. I no longer need to look like the “Rock” to attract women…my wife loves my dad body!

Realizing these changes in my life, my mindset, my physical realities and limitations, as well as my emotional need to attract the opposite , my approach to losing and maintaining my weight is much different now than it was then. Allow me to introduce a concept I call a Change of PACE. The concept is based on the way change is structured.

The P in PACE stands for Preserve. When looking at change we need to look at what we hope to preserve. This is not necessarily the first step but a necessary step. So, you made a resolution to read more books this year. What will you preserve, what will you hold back? Reading more books will require perhaps giving up something or allocating resources differently. Will reading more books require you to stop watching an NBA game in real life or on TV? If you are trying to lose weight will it stop you from having a cookie every now and then? When implementing change, you must decide what you will preserve or the things that inevitably remain outside your choices will become stumbling blocks and lead to failure.

The A in PACE stands for Accept. What are you willing to accept? This is usually the last step. Sometimes change requires you to accept things as they are in the present, or to accept thing as they are from the past. Sometimes accepting means you need to forgive or to accept the things that even though change occurs, will not change for you or someone else. Sometimes accepting means that other people will not be comfortable with the new change, or abandon you, or cease to be friends with you because of the change. On the positive side, you may have to accept that the changes may bring more success your way, more influence, wealth, new friends etc. and these things come with their own set of responsibilities and hang ups. Knowing what you are willing to accept is a sure baseline measure after the change occurs and assures that it is institutionalized.

The C in PACE stands for Create. This is usually the first step. What are you intending to change? Can you quantify it? Can you measure it? What will it look like when change occurs? Will you know, will anyone else know? Why do you need to change? How will you go about making the change? When do you expect to see progress or completion of the change? Who will benefit from the change? Will the world be a better place because of this change? These are important questions that need to be fleshed out.

The E in PACE stands for Eliminate. This is the step everyone knows all too well. Sometimes there are things that we will need to give up, sacrifice, trade, or eliminate in order to ensure that the change occurs and lasts.

In our next article we will dive even deeper into the structure of change. If you have questions or concerns or need help on your change journey contact KNUSTART, LLC at KNUSTART.com

KNUSTART, LLC is an online relationship and recovery organization that helps adults build and sustain lasting and healthy relationship with themselves, others, and their challenges.